A Fire in My Bones

I graduated from college 8 years ago and hoped that I was finally done with school forever.  I had thought briefly about going to seminary, but at that point there was no way I wanted to be a preacher.  The thought of standing before a large group of people every week and having to offer some sort of sermon honestly freaked me out.  (It still does).  I also wanted to get into ministry right away, and thought that ministry was more honorable then three more years of education.  Yet here I find myself back in school, at Western Theological Seminary, enrolled this semester in Introduction to Preaching.  

I've been fighting this for a while now.  Something inside me burns to preach, yet everything within me wants to resist.  I feel confident I could preach 3 or 4 good sermons, but then what?  What if I run out of material?  What if my 1st sermon is really good, and then everyone expects all of my sermons to be really good?  What if I mishandle God's word and give people the wrong idea about who God is?  What if people don't like what I say?  What if they are mean to me or disagree with me or get angry?  These are all my fears.  

Jeremiah faced ridicule and persecution when he spoke the word of God.  In Jeremiah 20, he complains to God that preaching God's Word is too difficult.  He even curses the day he was born because he is so burdened with preaching.  Yet he says in verse 9:

"But if I say I’ll never mention the LORD 
      or speak in his name, 
   his word burns in my heart like a fire. 
      It’s like a fire in my bones! 
   I am worn out trying to hold it in! 
      I can’t do it!"

I guess I'm becoming worn out from keeping it in.  So here I am Lord, vulnerable and afraid, yet willing to be brought to places where I am uncomfortable.  Be my strength and my guide.  Amen.

Re-Tri

Last summer I signed up for my 1st Triathlon.  I trained all summer long and then...
It got rained out :-(

June 10, 2012.

Let's "Tri" this again!

Martin Luther on Faith in Christ

Here's an excerpt from Martin Luther, "The Freedom of a Christian" that I thought was worth sharing.

"The 3rd benefit of faith is that it unites the soul with Christ as a bride is united with her bridegroom.  By this mystery, as the Apostle teaches, Christ and the soul become one flesh.  And if they are one flesh and there is between them a true marriage...it follows that everything they have they hold in common, the good as well as the evil.

Accordingly the believing soul can boast of and glory in whatever Christ has though it were its own, and whatever the soul has Christ claims as His own.  Let us compare these and we shall see inestimable benefits.

Christ is full of grace, life and salvation.  The soul is full of sins, death and damnation.  Now let faith come between them and sins, death and damnation will be Christ's, while grace, life and salvation will be the soul's; for if Christ is bridegroom, He must take upon Himself the things which are His bride's and bestow upon her the things that are His.

If He gives her His body and very self, how shall He not give her all that is His?  And if He takes the body of the bride, how shall He not take all that is hers?

Wow!

Consumed by Fear?

Undoubtedly, if you hang around church people or are a church person yourself, you have heard or thought things like this:

-The liberals are threatening the Christian foundational values of our nation.
-Legalizing gay marriage will erode the moral fabric of our society
-If we don't fight evolutionism and promote the literal creation story of Genesis 1 and 2, then the Bible will lose all its authority
-A Christian should never vote for a candidate who is pro-choice
-If there is no eternal damnation in hell, then there is no reason to live for God today
-The government shouldn't help poor people, but individual Christians should.  We need to fight the poor's sense of entitlement or our American, capitalist society will fall apart.
-The gospel is first and foremost about personal, individual salvation.  The salvation of creation, culture, and the world is secondary, or a byproduct of the 1st salvation.  If we confuse this, then we will lose the gospel entirely.

There are many more thoughts that are similar in the evangelical church today.  I'm not here to argue whether or not these statements are true or false.  But the overwhelming sense I get from all of these discussions is that we, the american church, are consumed with fear.  We don't know how to talk about these issues without getting really nervous, argumentative, and afraid of people who have different views than we do.  This is very unfortunate, since these are very important topics.  We need to talk about these things!  But we need to talk about them without fear.  God is not too small to handle our questions and disagreements.  We can't be afraid of people who think differently than we do.  We need to trust that God is sovereign - He alone holds the world in this hands and He alone is the head of the church.  He will not cease to be good, and the Bible will not lose it's power if people in the church have these discussions.  We need not be afraid!

"Perfect love drives out fear"  Let's strive to love more, and argue with fear less.

I love my imperfect church

I'm taking a course at seminary this semester called "Seminar in Congregational Studies: Learning to love the local church, warts and all."  Every church has warts.  There is no such thing as a perfect church.  At least, I have never been to one.  The same applies to marriage.  There are no perfect husbands, and no perfect wives, yet we still fall in love, and still commit ourselves to our spouses.

I love my church.  It is not perfect.  I love my wife.  She is not perfect.  What a beautiful picture of grace.  God loves us, and we are not perfect!  I'm thankful for these powerful pictures in my life that remind me how God loves us.  At our Thanksgiving service this past week, I was reminded again why I love my church.  We shared a friendly football game, ate donuts, and enjoyed spending time together.  There was anticipation and energy before the service started.  People came ready to meet God in worship.  We were encouraged and challenged by God's word.  We shared stories of gratitude because of God's goodness in our lives.  We shed tears.  We laughed.  We celebrated.  It's easy to love a church like this.

But it's not that easy.  People let us down.  There are disagreements.  We get hurt, and most likely we are involved in hurting others too.  But let's not forget that we love each other.  And that means grace and forgiveness must define our relationships.  Jesus loves us even though we are not perfect.  And that is why I love my church, her warts and all.

Chaotic Week

I woke up Monday morning and said to my wife, "this is going to be a crazy week...I'll see you on Friday."  Here's why:

Monday: Class all morning, work all afternoon, homework all evening
Tuesday: Work all day, class in the afternoon, more work all night
Wednesday: Class all morning, Work all afternoon, rehearsal all evening
Thursday: Attending a conference in Chicago all day, leaving early, getting back late.
Friday: Class all morning, work all afternoon.  FRIDAY EVENING is FREE!!!

No doubt, weeks like this are tough, but thankfully they don't happen every week.  Although, most of this stuff is great, and I'm looking forward to it, it is tough to not feel guilty for neglecting my wife and son.  (That's because I am).  Here's to looking forward to next week: no school, Thanksgiving dinner, extra sleep, and extra time with family.  To my generous and supportive wife, and to my amazing son, I love you both dearly, and I am so thankful you give me grace when I'm not around as much.  I miss you and I'm looking forward to spending time with you this weekend and next weekend!
How about you? How do you survive long weeks and chaotic schedules?

The Most Wonderful Time of the Year...

Some may say Christmas is the most wonderful time of the year, and while Christmas is wonderful, I'll take Autumn, thank you very much!  Take a look: